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8 Unknown Risky Sides of Being a People Pleaser

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5 min read

Being a people pleaser also has its risky and dangerous side. But they are barely known to people. In this article, you will get to know its eighth dangers.

Photo Credit: Stocksnap.io / Burst

While life is not easy, the last thing anyone would want to do is putting himself or herself in some risky and dangerous acts that would make it harder.

Unfortunately, being a people pleaser is one of those risky and dangerous sides that will make life harder for anyone. It only makes natter matters worst.

People pleasers innocently show their kind-hearted side, but they usually mistake some things they do for being cool.

They forget to set limits so that they can separate their usual kind personality from being a people pleaser.

You may tell someone, “Hey, do you know that what you’re doing is not what you’re supposed to do,” but the person won’t be convinced until you explain the repercussions.

It’s similar to what this article is about.

Risky sides of being a people pleaser

Below are the risky sides of being a people pleaser.

1. Puts much pressure on you

For all we know, we can’t please everyone. Innocently, one could be trying to be who the person is, but not knowing he or she exceeding limits by being a people pleaser.

Since it’s already known that we can’t please everyone, it will be risky if we continue to do that.

The truth is that we will continue to suck up our energy and mount much pressure on ourselves if you continue doing more than we are capable of.

The ones who value us will be contented with who we are and what we have to offer, and as a result, it should relieve stress and pressure from us when we don’t have to do more than we can.

That’s why we should never give in to those who don’t seem to value us for the effort we already put in and what we have to give. The moment we give in, that’s the moment we begin to mount pressure on ourselves.

Also, it can be risky in the sense of putting much pressure on us when get disappointed by those we were good at and trusted.

2. Losing control of yourself

Actually, it may seem like we all can be in control of ourselves at will. While we may think that way, it’s true, but not when we end up being people pleasers.

For example, what makes us to be in total control of ourselves is simply focus.

However, by the time we begin to have divided attention by being people pleasers, we begin to lose that focus. What this means in return is that we will end up losing control of ourselves.

Worst of it all, when we continue to lose control of ourselves, it negatively affects one core aspect of your mental strength which is self-control.

The more we harm this self-control, the more our mental toughness begins to slack as a result of that, instead of it getting stronger by the day.

3. Suppresses a lot of emotions

Instead of relaxing and enjoying everything life has to offer, we end up suppressing our emotions by caring what others think.

Because when we care too much about what others think about us, we stand a high chance of suppressing our emotions when we don’t get the kind of treatments we expected.

Odds are we will rarely get the kind of treatment we expect from people.

So, in order not to be a victim of such, one of the best ways to avoid it is to ensure we are not being a people pleaser, especially to those who end up treating you badly.

The right step to take would be to not censor ourselves to the point of suppressing our emotions.

4. Prone to a psychological and emotional breakdown

Our minds have a better chance of working properly like we expected when we surround ourselves with positive people who give good energy.

However, if we continue to be people pleasers, we will not be able to separate the toxic ones from the positive ones.

The reason is that we are constantly seeking to please everyone, so anything and anyone goes, as long as we have that desire to be liked by everyone.

Unfortunately, they will suck up our energy. As a result of that, we won’t be able to grow ourselves as we desired, and our ability to maintain a stable mindset will be minimal.

Read also: Characteristics of people pleasers you mistake for being cool

5. Prone to people using you

Another risky side of being a people pleaser is that we will be prone to people using us. Some people are very hungry for those they can take advantage of at their own comfort.

The more we continue being a people pleaser, the more we increase the chances of falling into the trap people users.

However, most times, such people aren’t even in search of people they can exploit, sometimes, they just perceive it and they strike.

As long as we can’t set limits and curtail the characteristics of people pleasers, it’s unlikely we won’t experience people using us.

6. People fist on your emotions

When it comes to being kind hearted, it involves our emotion much more to show that side of our personality to others.

So, because we need that emotion to carry out our kind acts, if we use it too much in expectations of something in return, it may get ugly sooner or later.

Because there will be a high probability that most people won’t care about the reasons for us doing so or even not caring about our emotions.

Also, we should note that when most people fist in our emotions, they don’t see it as damaging to our emotions.

7. No one knows who you truly are

If we decide to be a people pleaser and just please anybody that crosses our path without setting out limits, we will indirectly be giving mixed signals to people.

No one will know the true person we are and when we are genuinely being nice or just faking it all for our own interest.

But if we can control being a people pleaser and become more selective with people, then we will make it clear to people that we are either this or that.

So, instead of being a people pleaser and not setting boundaries, we should take charge so that we can filter some people out.

8. You begin to feel lonely

The final risky side of being a people pleaser is that we will begin to feel lonely. Either we detach or they detach, but it’s inevitable.

“some people are judged for being real, while others are loved for being fake.”

It just serves as an eye-opener to people pleasers that no matter how nice they’re, they can’t please everyone, and some people don’t have regard for it.

In that case, taking the kindness too far simply means we will be exposing ourselves to a wider range of haters instead of the opposite.

And we already know how it goes with haters. It’s much better to maintain a small circle of loyalty than a large circle of haters.

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